Friday, August 25, 2006
Perhaps I ought to renew my prescription for Wellbutrin soon. I've been out since before my trip to Jersey. Maybe that's why I'm feeling so washed out and useless and uncreative. Funny, though, my trip was a lot of fun.
Thursday, August 24, 2006
Someone convince me not to give music up entirely after tonight.
Maybe I should quit whining and get some sleep like I said I would a half hour ago.
Maybe I should quit whining and get some sleep like I said I would a half hour ago.
That's all, folks
This is how we go out...not with a band, nor a whimper or whisper either. We go out in a hail of guitars randomly going silent in the middle of songs, false starts, and temporary mindblackouts from having songs that I know like my own dick get the rug pulled out from under them. Total chaos. And a total fucking DISASTER. That's how Twiggy & Frollywog played its last show. I can't even pull off the last song--one of my own, "Triplets"--without shit going to shit. Forget going out with glory and a hearty "Thank You Columbus!!". My thanks were reserved for Tori, our erstwhile new singer, for saving my ass by lending me her Peavey str@t so I could finish the fucking song. Exact quote. "Thanks, Tori, for saving my ass." That ranks up there with "Ever get the feeling you've been cheated?" as a rock 'n roll epitaph. I offered to give my Les Paul to the next band, Sk8Naked or something--a bunch of high school thrash punks--to use as a stage prop to smash up or something. Or maybe I should have pulled a Townshendrix and destroyed it myself...something drastic and audacious and showmanlike to save my face. It would have felt really damn good to turn that malfucktioning Les Paul into toothpicks right then and there, even if I would've gotten thrown out and possibly sued for property damage. But no, I'm a wimp. And even my wimpy attempt at a BANG failed. I turned around to shake my amp--make the reverb springs go CRASH!!! you know--for a finale, and there wasn't even any fucking power getting to the amp. Looks like that power strip was too close to Jason's foot and he must have kept kicking the switch. GOD DAMN IT I'm not in a good mood, I think I'm gonna go sleep and forget this gig.
Only I can't... I was conscientious enough to bring both my digital camera and my camcorder. SO we have both photos AND video! WHoo hoo!
Sk8Naked had a bunch of their adoring fawning teenage pals there cheering them on. Ah, youth! They had lots of energy and teenage attitude oozing like acne juice (I, on the other hand: 32 years old, tired, surly, feeling quite irrelevant). Didn't think they were particularly good, but they sure have that MTV headbang stage shtick down pat. I'm sure they'll go far in the music biz.
Poop House Reilly, our opener, were great and entertaining, as always. We've played there at Andyman's with them before. Their set closer provides the sums-it-all-up quote that we couldn't provide ourselves: Shit motherfucker, goddamn.
Only I can't... I was conscientious enough to bring both my digital camera and my camcorder. SO we have both photos AND video! WHoo hoo!
Sk8Naked had a bunch of their adoring fawning teenage pals there cheering them on. Ah, youth! They had lots of energy and teenage attitude oozing like acne juice (I, on the other hand: 32 years old, tired, surly, feeling quite irrelevant). Didn't think they were particularly good, but they sure have that MTV headbang stage shtick down pat. I'm sure they'll go far in the music biz.
Poop House Reilly, our opener, were great and entertaining, as always. We've played there at Andyman's with them before. Their set closer provides the sums-it-all-up quote that we couldn't provide ourselves: Shit motherfucker, goddamn.
Wednesday, August 23, 2006
yawn
I'm uninspired
When I'm tired
I'd write at work, while coffee-wired
But I'm afraid I might get fired
That's probably the most interesting thing I've written all day. The future bodes well for me if I can maintain that level of brilliance.
When I'm tired
I'd write at work, while coffee-wired
But I'm afraid I might get fired
That's probably the most interesting thing I've written all day. The future bodes well for me if I can maintain that level of brilliance.
Oh hey...a book to read
I recently got my hands on Nation Of Rebels: How Counterculture Became Consumer Culture by a couple of philosophy profs from Canada whose names I forget. Excellent read. They pretty much confirm everything I said in my previous post about those trendy downtown lofts and the hosewankers who they're marketed to. I was not just imagining things. Ha! Elitist upper-middle-class fuckos.
And I might throw in that my recovery from Apple zealotry is all but complete. Macs don't suck, really, I guess. I just can't afford them. And I've gotten to really hate their hipster-yupster arrogance.
I really must get off this class warfare crap. It gets so old hearing little old me carping away at all the successful people in America all the time. Anyway, read.
And I might throw in that my recovery from Apple zealotry is all but complete. Macs don't suck, really, I guess. I just can't afford them. And I've gotten to really hate their hipster-yupster arrogance.
I really must get off this class warfare crap. It gets so old hearing little old me carping away at all the successful people in America all the time. Anyway, read.
A year's worth of dreck
Okay, here's the deal. I'm going to start writing in this damn thing regularly, dammit, because I need to friggin' write. My brain is atrophying. I feel the red fronds of my creative weed withering in the dry, harsh heat of a decade that I suspect we will all have pointedly forgotten about in twenty years time. Besides, the gauntlet has been laid down by my latest bandmate with her incessant blogging. More on her later. Anyway I think I need to get back in the habit of journaling or whatever it is. It doesn't have to be literature, I must remind myself, even though that is my natural reflex when writing. It does, however, have to be real.
So much has happened in the last year or so since I wrote, so I won't go into it all. First, though, 2005-2006 represents my first official post-lonely year. Cherie and I are now so tight that neither of us can really remember ever being apart or in fact not knowing each other. We've both done a lot of fun things, had some arguments as all couples do, and learned a lot about life from each other. I know that I'm a much more complete person than I ever could have been if I'd not met her--I mean her specifically, with her tough, honest, cut-the-bullshit New Jersey aura, her knowledge of the real world outside of the bland grey cocoon that is Columbus, her spirituality (something I never really considered exploring for myself before she came along and challenged my long-held ideas), and her absolute devotion to and belief in the people that she loves. I think I've learned now what a narcissistic, cynical, negative turd I've been for much of my life, and I think Cherie's taught me how to really care about and love not just her but other people in general. I still have a lot of issues I need to deal with, but I'm getting there.
Speaking of which, I've been thinking about new directions I might like to take in my life (all of which include Cherie, of course :-) ).
1) Possibly go back to school. I'll go more into detail in my next post, or something, but basically there's a strong, personal emotional/psychological motivation in addition to the usual career and insatiable lust for knowledge motivations.
2) Try to start earning my bread by doing freelance design. Freedom is the holy grail I'm looking for here. But the 8-to-5 routine combined with a really shitty salary and chronic de facto poverty are really getting old. Again, more later.
3) Creative endeavors: Now that Twiggy & Frollywog are one day away from ending it's tenure as a gigging band and Floorian is soldiering along at its usual glacial pace, I'm wondering whether I want to start a new band of my own, work on my own shit, take a break from music outside of Floorian, get involved with the local filmmaking scene instead, etc.
and the biggie:
4) I really, really, really want to move to New York City.
(There is, of course, an obvious fifth one as well, but I'll let you guess what that is...I'm biding my time, hehe.)
Tiredness is dragging me down. I think I will try to write again Friday, since I play my last Twiggy gig tomorrow night.
So much has happened in the last year or so since I wrote, so I won't go into it all. First, though, 2005-2006 represents my first official post-lonely year. Cherie and I are now so tight that neither of us can really remember ever being apart or in fact not knowing each other. We've both done a lot of fun things, had some arguments as all couples do, and learned a lot about life from each other. I know that I'm a much more complete person than I ever could have been if I'd not met her--I mean her specifically, with her tough, honest, cut-the-bullshit New Jersey aura, her knowledge of the real world outside of the bland grey cocoon that is Columbus, her spirituality (something I never really considered exploring for myself before she came along and challenged my long-held ideas), and her absolute devotion to and belief in the people that she loves. I think I've learned now what a narcissistic, cynical, negative turd I've been for much of my life, and I think Cherie's taught me how to really care about and love not just her but other people in general. I still have a lot of issues I need to deal with, but I'm getting there.
Speaking of which, I've been thinking about new directions I might like to take in my life (all of which include Cherie, of course :-) ).
1) Possibly go back to school. I'll go more into detail in my next post, or something, but basically there's a strong, personal emotional/psychological motivation in addition to the usual career and insatiable lust for knowledge motivations.
2) Try to start earning my bread by doing freelance design. Freedom is the holy grail I'm looking for here. But the 8-to-5 routine combined with a really shitty salary and chronic de facto poverty are really getting old. Again, more later.
3) Creative endeavors: Now that Twiggy & Frollywog are one day away from ending it's tenure as a gigging band and Floorian is soldiering along at its usual glacial pace, I'm wondering whether I want to start a new band of my own, work on my own shit, take a break from music outside of Floorian, get involved with the local filmmaking scene instead, etc.
and the biggie:
4) I really, really, really want to move to New York City.
(There is, of course, an obvious fifth one as well, but I'll let you guess what that is...I'm biding my time, hehe.)
Tiredness is dragging me down. I think I will try to write again Friday, since I play my last Twiggy gig tomorrow night.
